based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
