so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
