yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
My ass is underappreciated
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize