left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
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