smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
