finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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