Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
