I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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