I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
