evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I could fuck to npr.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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