How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
