I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
