Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
