At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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