You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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