sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
