It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
