I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize