i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The Olympian is in my bed
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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