I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
So much Jack, so little girl.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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