Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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