I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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