I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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