Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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