Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
