Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Randomize
