Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
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