I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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