Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Randomize
