They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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