there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
