some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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