is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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