: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
