i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
