so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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