I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
