We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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