I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
