I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
