No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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