just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
