i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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