okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
