i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
