i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize