i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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