My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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