Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
please come you make the beer taste better
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
