So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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