she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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