Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
