You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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