Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
